


Damaged Goods

by DevinCx, piratenami



Series: Knights of the Old Republic: Outcasts [2]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends: Knights of the Old Republic
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, F/M, Found Family, Gen, Non-Explicit Sex, Original Character-centric, Space Opera
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-02
Updated: 2018-05-02
Packaged: 2019-04-26 01:42:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14391549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DevinCx/pseuds/DevinCx, https://archiveofourown.org/users/piratenami/pseuds/piratenami
Summary: In need of rest, repairs, and profitable cargo, the crew of the Wanderer struggles to make ends meet and come to terms with the scars left by the events on Derra IV.





	Damaged Goods

**Author's Note:**

> This story takes place immediately after Book 1 of this series, and contains spoilers for that story.

The Wanderer left Derra IV a few days after the battle on the planet's surface.

The Republic techs had apparently been thorough, and there was very little trace left behind of their recent presence — except, perhaps, that the ship's engines no longer made that one peculiar whining sound that Renn had never quite been able to fix before. One of the techs had even taken it upon himself to repair T5's fresh battle-scoring.

Renn was quiet as the ship lifted off. If the others put it down to his ordeal on the planet or his resentment of the Republic techs, he didn't care. Let them think what they wanted. He read his display again, his mouth set in a line.

The taunting message from his old "friend" Gaman had been waiting for him when he'd come back aboard the ship. He didn't mention it to Liana, but even now, as he calculated the jump to Nar Shaddaa on one side of his screen, he had a tracer program working in the background on Gaman's message.

Renn had been the one to suggest Nar Shaddaa as their next destination. Liana readily agreed, as the Hutt-ruled world seemed a likely place to lay low for a few weeks and possibly find a job, but that hadn't been his only reason.

He had someone he needed to talk to. Preferably without the others finding out.

"The navicomputer's ready and the hyperdrive's showing green," Renn said.

Liana nodded and triggered the jump to hyperspace. He pushed himself up from his chair. "I'm going to take another look around to make sure the Republic techs didn't screw anything up." He could almost feel her concerned eyes on his back as he left the cockpit. Hopefully when he didn't self-destruct in the next few days, she'd stop looking at him like that.

He made a few circuits of the ship, followed by a mournfully beeping T5, who seemed to be upset about having been repaired. Renn ignored the droid's complaints. He wasn't entirely sure what he was looking for. Maybe he just needed some space.

Eventually, he returned to the cockpit. Liana was getting ready to take the Wanderer back into normal space. Kara sat at one of the rear cockpit stations, idly humming to herself. Aeron sat opposite her, apparently lost in thought. Liana, as Renn expected, looked moderately relieved at his state of continued existence as he came in.

Renn glanced back at Kara as he sat down. "That's a pretty tune. It sounds familiar."

Liana blinked at him. "Renn?"

"What?"

"She was quiet," Aeron said, frowning.

"I heard nothing," Liana said.

"She was just humming," Renn said, looking again at Kara for confirmation.

Kara blinked. "Um, I was. Just… in my head."

Everyone stared at him. "What-?" But Renn never got to finish the question, as all hell broke loose around them.

***

When the loud _ka-thunk_ sounded from the rear of the ship and the Wanderer suddenly pitched forty-five degrees to port, it took them all completely by surprise.

Liana quickly corrected their course. "Aeron, take the controls," she said. "Just keep the ship steady. Renn...?"

But Renn and T5 were already out of the cockpit, heading aft to inspect whatever that had been.

Liana went after them, Kara trailing behind her. She found Renn crouched on the engine room floor in front of the hyperdrive, swearing. "Those kriffing Republic techs," he said. T5 beeped his agreement from where he was plugged in to the nearby computer terminal.

"What happened?" she asked.

"The shunting circuit shorted and blew the transition rig." Renn sat back on his heels and looked up at her.

"How quickly can you fix it?"

"I can't. We're gonna need to replace it, and I don't have the parts. We should be fine on sublight engines for now, but we're not going to light speed again until we can get new parts and get them installed."

Liana's tail lashed in irritation. "Do you know what caused it?"

Renn shrugged. "Could've been damage from the crash, could've been the Republic techs. I can't tell with it in this state."

Kara hung back, probably afraid she'd be in the way. "How bad is that?" she asked.

Renn sighed. "Well, it's not a difficult thing to replace. We shouldn't have a problem finding parts. But... it's going to be pricey. The good news is that what broke isn't connected to anything else. So, assuming there aren't _more_ surprises lurking, we shouldn't have any other complications from this."

"At any rate, we will need to land to get this repaired," Liana said after a moment's consideration. "We might as well go with our original plan for now. Let's find a place to dock on Nar Shaddaa."

Renn nodded and stood. "I can start checking around, see what kind of price I can get us. Hopefully we won't have to sell off everything we own to fix this."

Liana's tail lashed again, and she started back to the cockpit.

***

The Wanderer safely landed on Nar Shaddaa a couple of hours later, in the the moon's early evening.

Liana sat quietly in her seat in the cockpit, watching as Renn tried to negotiate the ridiculous docking fee with a local Hutt official. He got them to come down a little bit, but not much. The one major downside of Nar Shaddaa was having to deal with the prices that the Hutts could get away with charging in their territory.

She generally had no more problem with the Hutts than she had with the Republic or the Sith or any of the various independent factions in the galaxy; they were all just people to her, and she stayed neutral unless they acted against her or her crew. The Republic was usually safe, and they frequently took work there. After what had happened, she had no intention of going near Sith territory anytime soon, just in case her crew was still wanted there, or someone sought revenge for what happened on Derra IV. The Hutts remained neutral toward the other major powers in the galaxy, and there were many criminals here. Still, it wasn't a bad place, if you knew to watch your back.

As soon as the docking fee was paid, she left her partner to his other work, trying to procure the replacement parts they needed. She headed to the galley to grab some food while she could. Kara and Aeron were both there in the main hold already.

"I feel like I should apologize. I promise things are not always this... interesting," Liana said to her two new crew members. She sat down across from the Jedi with her food.

"It is a bother," Aeron said, in an obvious attempt at humor. "But if we didn't have these little complications to entertain us, we'd have to go hunt up another Sith Lord to harass, and they're a bit thin on the ground at the moment."

Beyond him, Kara stiffened, then slowly lowered her mug of caf from her lips to the table, eyes following it and staring through the floor.

Liana was about to say something else when Renn came in from the cockpit. His expression was serious. "What is it?" she asked instead.

"Well," he said, with a heavy sigh, "I've got good news, and I've got bad news." Liana gestured for him to go on. He sat down on the bench next to her, across from Kara. "Naira can definitely get us the parts we need, and for a better price than I could find on my own. That's the good news."

"And the bad news?" Liana asked, eyeing him.

"We don't have enough in the ship's general account to cover it. Especially not if we want to keep eating and keep the ship fueled for the next several weeks," Renn said.

"I see," Aeron said, stroking his beard. "What are our options then?"

"We could probably scrape enough together if we all pool our personal funds," Renn said. "But I don't like that idea. At all. That leaves us in bad shape for the next thing that goes horribly wrong. We need to keep something in reserve. It would practically bankrupt us if we tried it."

Liana nodded. Her partner was the primary keeper of the ship's financial accounts, so she trusted him at his word there. "We could take out a loan of some kind, perhaps?" she asked.

Renn laughed, a bitter sound. "No way. Not on Nar Shaddaa anyway. It would either be through the Hutts or... well, just please trust me when I say it's a bad idea to get involved in anything like that, Captain."

"Seconded," Aeron said.

Kara nodded her agreement but stayed quiet.

"Hmm." Liana considered that, her tail moving slowly. It would be foolish to ignore a unanimous consensus. "Very well. Our engines will still work in-system. Could we find some local job to supplement our income? Some in-system hauling, perhaps?"

"Yeah... that might work." Renn nodded. "Let me check with Naira. She might be able to find us something."

"Do you trust this contact?" Liana asked.

"She's okay. Naira's a slicer and a mechanic. We've worked with her before. I've known her for years," Renn said.

"You knew Gaman for years, too," Aeron said. "I'm not trying to be offensive, but with our recent luck, I think it bears an 'are you sure?'."

"Yeah, but I never met Gaman face to face. And besides, there's no bounty on us anymore." He glared over at the Jedi. "You want to meet her? I don't care. We can all go down and talk to her if you want."

"I would like to meet her," Aeron said with a smile. "Thank you!"

Renn rolled his eyes and looked at Kara. "I suppose you want to come too?"

Kara looked up. She hadn't been paying attention. "Huh? Oh. Um... yeah, sure."

"Fine. Let me give her another call and arrange a meeting." Renn pushed himself up from the bench and stalked toward the cockpit door again.

Liana watched him go with her ears back, concerned. His temper seemed rather shorter than normal these days.

Kara stood from the table and yawned, stretching. "I'll never get used to ship time and planet time being different. I'm going to turn in."

"Perhaps we all should get some sleep soon," Liana said. "We will probably have a lot of work to do tomorrow if Renn's contact is able to find us a job."

***

That night, Renn dreamed of the Silence, and the cave on Derra IV.

The cloud of death and darkness flowed into him, consumed him, filled him. 

His consciousness was driven so far under that he was fully subsumed by it. He could only watch helplessly as it bent him to its will.

This time, Kara couldn't save him.

She couldn't save herself either.

He knew exactly what it wanted to use him for. It told him, taunted him with the knowledge. It wanted him to kill those who stood in its way, to revel in their deaths, and to open the way for it to unmake everything. 

There was nothing he could do to stop it. He was powerless, a prisoner in his own mind.

He watched in detached horror as his own hand, out of his control, reached for one of Kara's discarded lightsabers. He ran Liana through with it before she could react.

Then he turned on Kara, raising the lit lightsaber again. She begged him to stop, begged him to come back to her, but it wasn't him any more. 

It wasn't him that killed her....

Renn came up out of the nightmare with a startled cry.

It had felt so real, so visceral. He curled in on himself, shaking uncontrollably, his back to the wall and his eyes darting constantly, never focusing long enough to really see anything, searching for threats that weren't there.

It was the pounding on the dormitory door that brought him around: a frantic, almost panicked smack of a single balled fist against the hatch.

He started to rise. "What's the matter, Jedi? Get locked... out...?" But it wasn't Aeron outside. Aeron was sitting bolt upright in his own bunk across from Renn's, eyes wide with terror.

"Renn?" Kara's voice called through the closed door, trembling with fear. "Renn, are you all right?!"

He stumbled over to the door and opened it on autopilot, his body wound tight and his heart pounding. Her shaking voice somehow made everything worse, intensified the feeling of dread in the pit of his stomach.

As the door slid open, her hand, already in motion, slowed to land on his bare chest in a worried caress instead, her eyes wide to see him unhurt. She seemed startled by the contact, and stumbled back a step.

Renn glanced from Kara to Aeron and back. "Did you...?" He didn't know the words for what he wanted to ask, and didn't know how he already knew the answer. 

"I think," she said, just as reticent, "we all need to talk."

***

A few minutes later, the three of them sat soberly around the table near the galley, mugs of caf untouched in front of them. Renn stared down at his hands. They had been shaking earlier when he went to pick up his drink. He didn't know how to talk about Jedi stuff. And this was definitely Jedi stuff.

"What's happening to me?" he asked finally. His voice only trembled a little bit.

Aeron cleared his throat, obviously just as uncomfortable with this as Renn. "I think... I think when the Silence, whatever it was... when it left you, some effects remained."

Kara slammed a fist down on the table. _"No!_ The Silence is gone! All of it. Renn's Song hasn't changed. It's the same as it's always been! There's no Silence in him."

Aeron kept his voice calm. "Yes, but Renn could not have gone through that experience without changes. His presence in the Force, his Song, his soul... whatever you want to call it. The Silence didn't leave him willingly. I think it left scars. Particularly in the both of you."

Renn frowned at him. "So what does that mean exactly? Why did you both react to my... nightmare? Are you in my head?"

"No." Aeron and Kara reacted in perfect unison. He desisted and she continued. "At least, I don't think so. I haven't been _actively_ in your mind, but... well...."

"What?" Aeron asked.

She began again, looking firmly down at her mug of caf and trying to make herself as small as possible. "Over the last few days, I've gotten.... It's like I've known what you're feeling. And, I think, vice versa. Like earlier, when I was Singing in my mind, and you thought you heard me humming."

"I'm not a Jedi," Renn said. "That's not possible."

Aeron nodded. "No one said you were. But if being with this crew has taught me anything, it's that Jedi and Sith are not the totality of the Force."

Renn was still confused. The Force had always been an abstract concept to him, at least until he'd met these two. He'd never really had much reason to deal with either Jedi or Sith before. "So, what, suddenly I can use the Force?"

"No, you're not sensitive to the Force, per se," Aeron said. "I think you're sensitive to Kara. Specifically so. The two of you were at the epicenter of Kara's... phenomenon. It's understandable that some sort of... Force bond was created by it."

Kara shook her head. "Then why did Renn's nightmare affect you too?"

The itinerant Jedi considered her question. "When you exploded in light," he said, "I was overwhelmed by the sheer avalanche of Force presence it generated. Perhaps I became peripherally ensnared as well."

All three fell silent, thinking of the ramifications, when a soft footstep and a purring yawn announced Liana's arrival. "Well, you three are up early this morning." She stopped in the doorway, taking in the sight of her crewmates sitting together around the table, and the tension that stretched between them. Her eyes fixed on Renn's face for a moment, then she focused on the others. "Did something happen?"

"No," Renn said quickly.

"I wasn't asking _you,"_ Liana said.

"That hurts, Liana."

She ignored him, looking between Aeron and Kara. "Is everything all right?"

Kara lifted her caf and sipped at the now lukewarm beverage. "Grab a mug and pull up a bench, Boss. This is going to take some explaining...."

***

Later that afternoon, the crew of the Wanderer all piled into a rented speeder to go to the meeting. Yay, more money spent that they couldn't really afford, Renn thought.

He had arranged for them to meet his contact at her workshop. Naira promised she could get them both a job and the parts they needed. Liana reluctantly let her partner drive, since he knew where they were going, and, as she put it, he was worse at giving directions than he was at driving.

Renn brought the vehicle to a halt outside a run-down building in an industrial area of Nar Shaddaa. It was pretty unimpressive to look at from the exterior. "This is it," he said.

Liana tilted her head, taking in the building, then nodded. "We should go inside then, if she is expecting us." Renn noted she had a hand on her blaster as they started toward the door. He couldn't really blame her. Despite what he'd told Aeron, he was still a little wary of putting faith in his contacts after Gaman's betrayal, if he was completely honest. But Naira had never let him down before.

Renn led the way into Naira's workshop. On the inside, the run-down building was a wall-to-wall jumble of parts, computer terminals, and scrap metal. Renn scanned the room, and caught sight of the woman they'd come to meet, currently at work welding something at a work table on the other side of the room.

Naira was a slender Nautolan, with the green skin common to her species. Her long head-tails were loosely bound behind her at the nape of her neck, to keep them out of the way of her work. She had dark-tinted goggles covering her eyes to protect them from the bright light and sparks of her welding torch. She glanced up as they entered. "Just a sec!" she called, turning back to finish up what she was working on.

After a moment, she shut down her welder and set it aside. She straightened up and lifted her goggles, revealing large black eyes, then pulled off her heavy gloves. She approached Renn, a smile on her lips. "Hey, Falani. Long time." She held out a hand, and Renn clasped it. 

"Hey, Naira," he said, grinning at her. "Whatcha working on?"

She laughed. "Fixing up some old junk speeder I found. I figure it might be worth some credits if I can get it working again." She looked curiously at Renn's companions with her unblinking gaze.

"Naira, this is our Captain, Liana, and this is Kara. And-" He hesitated over how to introduce the Jedi. "Eh, don't worry about him." Liana gave Renn a warning look, which he totally ignored.

Aeron frowned, then swept forward into a low formal bow. "Aeron Rhade, at your service and that of your family, milady Naira."

Naira looked taken aback by the gesture. "Where'd you find this one, Falani?" she asked.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you," he said, rolling his eyes. Liana offered her hand to Naira. Renn noted that Kara was gawking at the Nautolan, looking a little startled. He was really going to have to take her on a tour of Nar Shaddaa at some point and get her used to seeing different species, before she accidentally caused an incident.

"Well, it's nice to meet you all," Naira said, shaking Liana's hand cautiously. "You guys are stuck, huh?"

"Yep," Renn said. "Hyperdrive's dead until we get those parts, but we can still haul stuff in-system."

"You're lucky. I think." She nodded. "I already found a potential job for you with the parameters you requested. If you want, I can play middleman and get you the parts with the pay from it. It should be enough to cover what you need and my cut."

Renn hoped Naira wouldn't mention exactly what those parameters were. He didn't want the rest of them getting suspicious about why he wanted to avoid certain planets in this system. "That sounds perfect," he said. "What's the catch? Why does it pay so well?"

Naira hesitated. "You... might not like what the job is," she said.

He had a bad feeling about this. "What is it, Naira?"

"Hauling a herd of live nerfs from here to Nar Hekka."

Renn groaned.

Kara brightened instantly. "Nerfs? How many head?"

Naira checked a datapad. "Uh... Looks like... twenty, I think? The mass rating for the herd should fit your freighter, barely."

"Adults, calves?"

"A mix... You know about livestock, girl?"

"Yeah, I grew up on a farm."

"Here, then." Naira handed Kara the datapad.

Kara quickly perused the data. "Yeah... fodder, support water included... males castrated..."

"What?" Renn asked.

"Do you _want_ a horny bull trying to mount a cow in the cargo bay?" Kara grimaced. "Because I sure don't."

"I'm pretty sure none of us do," Aeron said, eyes wide.

"Anyway, it all looks good, I think." Kara showed Naira's datapad to Liana.

Their Captain took it and looked over the details. "It will probably take us about six or seven days to get there. Will that work?" She handed the datapad back to the Nautolan.

Naira nodded, then tapped on her datapad a few more times. "Sure. I can even arrange for the hyperdrive parts you need to be there waiting for you there, so you don't have to come all the way back here and waste fuel."

Renn sighed. "I guess that means we're doing this. Send me all the info for our client on Nar Hekka."

"Already did," Naira said, her tone cheerful. "Anything else you need, Falani?"

Renn looked at his crewmates. "You guys go on," he said. "I want to talk shop with Naira for a couple minutes. Techie stuff. Computers. Probably really boring."

Liana looked at him suspiciously, but then she finally nodded and led the others back out to their waiting speeder.

***

"So," Liana asked the other two when they got back to the speeder, "what do we think? Is Naira trustworthy?"

"Yes," Aeron said with a firm nod.

_"She_ was," Kara said. "Not sure about Renn though. He's up to something."

"He's Renn, Kara," Aeron said. "That pretty much goes without saying. I'm sure he'll let us know when it becomes relevant."

"Yeah, I know.... It's just.... Look, I'll be back in a minute."

***

Renn waited until he was sure they were gone, and spoke to Naira in a low voice. "Heard anything from Gaman lately?"

Naira shook her head. "You know you don't contact Gaman, Falani. He contacts you. Besides, he went off the grid a week or two ago, it seems like, and no one's heard from him since."

"Yeah, and I know exactly why."

"Oh?"

"Gaman sold us out and stabbed me in the back. Hell if I'm going to just roll over and let him get away with that."

"Whoa, seriously? You're after Gaman? You know how good he is."

"I'm better," Renn said. "I won't let him just run and hide. I'm gonna make his life a living hell until I catch up with him."

Naira laughed. "I knew you had an ego, Falani, but damn...."

"Do you have any leads for me, or not?" he said. "I know he used to operate out of Nar Shaddaa, at least at one point."

"If he did, I never met him in person." Naira looked like she was considering his request, though her unblinking eyes gave little away. Then she sighed. "Let me poke around, ask a few questions. Maybe I can get you something. Give me a few days. I'll comm you with what I find out before you leave the system."

"Thanks, Naira. I appreciate it."

She shrugged. "Don't mention it. Just buy me a drink or two next time you're on Nar Shaddaa, okay?"

"You got a deal." Renn clasped Naira's hand again briefly, to seal their informal bargain. 

"Take care," she said. "And be careful!" 

Renn nodded, then headed out to join the others.

As he left the shop, though, he found Kara waiting for him right by the door.

"Hey," she said as he stopped.

"Huh?" he asked. "What's up?"

"I was going to ask you the same thing."

"Nothing," he said. "Come on, the others are waiting for us."

She rolled her eyes. "Look, I've got a proposition for you. You can say you don't want to tell me, but don't bother trying to lie to me when you're screaming 'think up a lie' at the top of your Song."

He froze. "I'll tell you one last time, stay out of my damn head, Kara."

"I'm your friend, Renn, so I worry about you, dammit. And for the record, I respect your privacy. Respect my kriffing intelligence."

Kara was one of those people who swore so infrequently that when it happened, it tended to make everyone around her stop short.

"You're right," Renn said, not meeting her eyes. "Sorry."

"Aeron said you'd tell us what's gnawing at you when you're ready," she said. "I can wait till then. Just remember that, whatever it is, you're not in it alone." She punched him lightly in the arm. "And you're also right. They're waiting for us. Come on, we gotta clean out the cargo bay."

"Clean it out?"

"All the supply crates gotta be moved out, and any stray sharp bits of metal need to be smoothed down. Maybe even find a layer of straw or something to cover the floor with. Trust me, cleanup will be easier if we have something absorbent down before we pick up the herd."

Renn looked a bit green. "Oh yeah... The ship is gonna smell great for a while, huh?"

"Just like home," Kara said, forcing a smile. "Come on, let's get to work."

***

Renn retreated to the cockpit when they went to load the cargo. Kara seemed to know what she was doing, and besides, he couldn't really see himself being of any help down there. It was actually kind of cute how she'd taken charge of the whole thing. He'd never dare say that to her face, though.

Instead he busied himself with the pre-flight routine, and getting their course plotted out in the computer. Liana's initial estimate was right on the money. It should only take them about six days or so to get to Nar Hekka on sublight engines.

He glanced up when the cockpit door opened. Liana entered, her tail flicking back and forth in annoyance. He looked a question at her.

"Apparently," she said, sounding irritated, "I frighten the cargo. Kara has banished me from my own cargo hold. On my own ship."

Renn chuckled. "Well, you do have sharp claws and teeth. They probably think you're gonna eat them."

Liana's ears flicked as she sat down at her station. "Kara said the same thing."

A moment later, Aeron entered the cockpit and took one of the secondary station chairs, a bemused expression on his face.

Renn looked at him curiously. "What happened?"

Aeron was obviously having trouble finding words. "Kara," he said at last. "Kara is... communing with the cattle."

Renn and Liana both blinked at him. "What do you mean?" Liana asked.

"I mean, she's walking among them.... I believe she would say she is Singing to them."

"Huh," Renn said.

Liana reached for her comlink. "Kara?" she asked. "Is the cargo secure and ready for us to take off?"

A moment later, Kara responded in a dreamy tone of voice. "They're all docile and ready. Just give us as smooth a ride as you can."

Liana looked over at Renn.

"Our course is set and ready, Captain," he said, turning back to his console. "I finished all my pre-flight checks. Engines are green."

Liana's attention settled on her own console and she released the docking clamps. The ship rose smoothly under her steady hand, out through the docking bay doors and up into the atmosphere above Nar Shaddaa.

***

The rest of their first day out from Nar Shaddaa was pretty uneventful. Renn and Liana spent most of it in the cockpit. She always preferred to keep manual control for the first leg of any trip. Renn had plenty of his own work to do as well. He was still tracking down all of Gaman's old haunts in the depths of the holonet, looking for hints and clues.

Finally, Liana engaged the autopilot and stood, checking her chrono. "It's later than I thought. We should both get some food and sleep while we can," she said. "The droids can monitor the flight."

"I'll get something in a while."

She watched him for a moment, then laid her hand on his shoulder. "Renn-"

"I'm fine," he said, interrupting her before she could say anything more. "Really. I just want to finish what I'm working on, okay?"

It didn't look like she entirely believed him, but finally she gave his shoulder an affectionate squeeze and left.

The truth was, he wasn't fine.

Ever since that day in the cave on Derra IV, he'd felt... empty. 

Not all the time. It had been worse in the beginning. Immediately after Kara had driven the Silence from him with her brilliant light, it had taken him a long time to feel anything at all past the numbness that had fallen over him. It was almost as if, between them, Kara and the Silence had burned out some part of him. But he'd never been able to put it into words, not aloud. 

He had been getting better in the days since, but, every so often, that hollow feeling still crept up on him, catching him unaware.

Renn leaned back in his station chair and closed his eyes. Not sleeping. He didn't dare do that right now, in case that horrible nightmare came back. But just... not thinking, not feeling, like an empty shell. He had lost something he didn't even have a name for. Not even his search for Gaman was purpose enough to fill that void.

A soft footstep behind him made him open his eyes and look up. "Renn?" Kara asked. She was wrapped in a warm robe, and her hair was damp. In her hands she held two steaming mugs of soup. "Want some company?"

He sighed. "I'm... not good company right now," he said, voice quiet.

"That's kinda why I'm here." She slipped into the seat next to him and offered him one of the mugs. "Dinner?"

Of course it was why she was here. Renn took the mug from her, reaching for it on autopilot. "Liana sent you, huh?" he asked.

"Nope. Honestly, you did." At his quizzical look, she tapped her temple. "I heard you, up here. I figured you needed a friend, even if it was just for quiet stargazing."

A hint of something he couldn't identify rose past his numbness. "Yeah, I guess so," he said, then he chuckled wryly. "Sorry, I didn't mean to drag you out here. I'm not used to how this works."

"Me neither," she said. "But we're learning together, right? We'll make mistakes, but we will figure it out eventually. As for dragging me out here, don't worry about it. I never get to just look at the stars. It's rather beautiful."

Renn took a sip from his mug. "I don't ever get tired of seeing them," he said. "They mean I'm home." Then he realized what he'd just said, and who he'd said it to. "Sorry. I didn't mean to...." His voice trailed off weakly.

Kara looked down into her mug. "Home.... I'm still not used to the idea that where I grew up is gone, that my parents are dead.... But then their murderer turned out to be a victim himself." She took a sip of her soup. "It's all one big cycle of misery, isn't it?"

"Well, this got dark real fast," Renn said. "See, I told you I'm bad company right now. Apparently it's contagious." He looked down at his mug, too.

She actually laughed. "Oh, Renn... trust me, right now you can't depress me any more than I was when I walked in here. It's odd, though. Today, with the nerfs, I mean. It actually helped. It was like, for once, I could pull my weight with the crew."

Renn glanced back over at her. "You mean how you basically took over?" he asked, a hint of a smirk on his lips.

She blushed. "Well... kinda? I'm usually just a willing pair of hands with no idea what's going on most of the time, but that was something I knew how to do."

"Hey, I don't have a problem with it. The less I have to deal with them, the better." He shrugged. "Liana was kind of irritated at being kicked out of her own cargo bay, though."

"Well, she was spooking the cattle!" Kara said. "They thought she was a predator and acted accordingly."

"I told her basically the same thing when she stalked up here." Renn chuckled. "The Jedi said you were... oh, how did he put it? Communing with the nerfs?" He couldn't quite manage a good impression of Aeron's tone, but he thought she would get the idea.

Kara giggled. "I was just picking out the most excited ones and calming them. Stroking their backs, speaking softly, that sort of thing." She made a face. "I was not seeking the wisdom of the Nerf God or whatever Aeron was on about."

Renn couldn't help himself. He started laughing so hard that he almost spilled what was left of his soup. "Please, please tell me he actually said that."

"I don't know what he was saying. He was too busy trying to keep from stepping in paddies. It looked like a bad dance number."

"I wonder if we got it on the security cameras...?" He grinned at her.

And suddenly he realized... whatever had happened, she'd completely driven away the empty feeling inside him. Had she done that on purpose?

"Judging by the look on your face, I'd say mission accomplished," she said, inadvertently confirming his suspicion. "Laughter is the best for what ails you, giving it or receiving it."

"Thanks, Kara." Then, after another uncertain, hesitant pause, he said, "You know, if you want, I could show you how to do some of this. Basic stuff, like sensors, comms, that sort of thing. You should probably know anyway, in case of an emergency."

She brightened. "That would be great, thanks!"

"Okay, let's start with comms...."

They went on like that into the early hours of morning, and both eventually went to their beds exhausted, but feeling much improved.

***

That night's dream had seemed innocuous enough in the beginning. Kara came to the cockpit again, wearing the same robe she'd had on earlier.

Except, she didn't just sit down and talk with him this time.

Instead, she let the robe fall in a puddle on the floor, revealing that she wasn't wearing anything underneath it. And then she wrapped her arms around him and kissed him, her body pressed eagerly against him.

It was too much. Need surged in him.

In two steps, he pinned her up against the bulkhead, his mouth on hers, his hands running hungrily over her bare skin. She gasped and moaned his name. The sound only drove him into further frenzy. They both fumbled with his pants, shoving them out of the way. He needed her, needed to be inside her, now.

Renn woke with a start, breathing hard, incredibly aroused and incredibly frustrated.

Where the _hell_ had _that_ come from?

He'd had dreams like that before, sure, but... why Kara, damn it? She was a kid.

No, she really wasn't, he had to admit. She was only a few years younger than he was. And... she was attractive. They'd been spending a lot more time together lately.

Maybe it was just a natural reaction. Still, it was embarrassing as all hell. It made him feel vaguely guilty, like he was taking advantage of her or something.

He couldn't let himself get involved with her. She was just a crewmate. Besides, she thought he was a jerk, even if they were kind of becoming friends. There was no way she was interested in him like that. 

He rolled over carefully, and peered across at Aeron's bunk. Thank the stars, the Jedi hadn't reacted to _that_ dream the way he had to the nightmare. Renn pushed himself up from the bed and ducked into the refresher. He turned the water in the shower as cold as he could tolerate and stood under it until he was shivering from the frigid stream.

When he had himself back under control, he shut off the shower and got dressed. He didn't want to risk going back to sleep and having another dream... or a nightmare, this time. Besides, it wasn't that much earlier than when he normally woke up. He left the dormitory and headed for the main hold.

Liana was already up, of course. She was usually the first one awake in the mornings. "Good morning. I prepared some food for everyone," she said, gesturing to the galley.

"Thanks," Renn said. He went for the caf first, and then grabbed some of the food almost as an afterthought. It wasn't anything spectacular, but then he was used to quick meals and rations.

"Are you all right, Renn?" she asked as he sat next to her at the table.

"Huh? Yeah, I'm fine."

Liana just looked at him, saying nothing. She didn't need to.

"I just had a dream, okay? It's fine."

"Nightmares again?" she asked in sympathy.

Renn shook his head. "No. Just... it's nothing, really. It was only a stupid dream." There was part of him that wanted to tell her about it, and ask her advice, but, well, it was Liana. She had a certain bluntness that could be... uncomfortable.

Her tail moved slowly behind her, but then she nodded, as if she were only reluctantly accepting his words.

He turned his attention to his food, glad to have something to distract him.

Aeron came into the main hold a few moments later, and Kara a little while after that. Maybe it was some holdover from the dream, but Renn found himself watching her as she went about gathering her breakfast. He'd never quite noticed how graceful she was when she moved.

She was wearing the same heavy homespun tunic and leggings she'd worn when they first met in the Weary Traveller cantina back on Derra IV. She hadn't worn that in a while, favoring her newer, lighter clothing. It was almost like she wanted to wear more clothes today.

She glanced over and caught him looking, then looked away, her cheeks flaming red.

_Damn it,_ he thought, as she quickly grabbed a mug of caf and retreated without saying a word or making further eye contact with any of them.

She knew about his dream. Because of course she did. That damn bond or whatever it was....

Renn finished his food quickly and all but fled to the cockpit, where he threw himself into his station chair and stared intently at the blank monitor.

After a time, Aeron stepped into Renn's sanctuary. "Renn, is everything all right?"

Renn looked up at him, then quickly away. "Yeah, I'm fine." He brought some sensor readings up on his display so it looked like he was actually working.

Aeron was often awkward when it came to interacting with other people, and now was no exception. "We... couldn't help but notice that you and Kara were... uncomfortable, this morning."

Renn groaned. "It's nothing," he said, his voice defensive.

"As you say." Aeron raised a placating hand. "I just wanted to offer.... I think I could teach you to shield your mind, to help keep such... complications, from happening in the future."

"I don't need your help, Jedi," Renn said. "I can handle it."

"Very well, but the offer stands if you change your mind. In the meantime, I'll leave you be." Aeron bowed his head and left the cockpit.

***

Kara set the empty mug into the equally empty bowl and wondered if she could sneak her dishes back into the galley area without encountering the rest of the crew just yet. Maybe she could get B4 to do it....

The door to the dormitory opened, and Liana came in. "Kara? Are you all right?"

"Yes," she said. "Of course, why wouldn't I be?"

"Because you do not normally take your meals in the dormitory."

"Well... it's complicated, Liana."

Liana's tail lashed in a familiar way. Kara had come to call it the 'Trianii eye roll'. She walked over and sat on her own bunk, facing Kara. "Something has happened between you and Renn." It wasn't a question.

Kara nodded. "Sort of."

"Was it... unwelcome?" Liana was being uncharacteristically oblique.

_"No!"_ Kara said. She felt her face burning hot again, dammit. "Just... unexpected. Besides it was just...." She trailed off.

"Yes?" Liana sounded encouraging.

"It was a stupid dream, all right?!" Embarrassment of this level really needed a different name.

"Then he had the same dream," Liana said.

"What?"

"Both of you were rather... aroused... this morning."

Curiosity overcame Kara and she managed to ask, "How did you know that?"

Liana tapped her nose. "We predators have keen senses of smell."

Kara doubted there was any blood left below her cheeks at this point. She sat rigidly still.

"You are both humans of appropriate age, in close proximity to one another," Liana said, as soothingly as she could. "It is only natural, nothing to feel ashamed of."

"It's not that...."

"Kara, I could read by the light of your blush alone."

"All right, not _only_ that! It just... it came out of nowhere. I like Renn, when he isn't being an ass. But...."

"But not that way?"

Kara nodded.

"You have only known him for a short time," Liana said. "And in that time your relationship has already changed drastically. I would not be so quick to decide its final shape."

Then she rose and picked up Kara's dishes. "I will take these away for you. Try not to hide in here all day though. You must tend to the animals, after all." Liana walked out, tail still swishing back and forth.

***

Kara spent the rest of the day making sure she was anywhere Renn wasn't.

Whatever this bond of theirs was, it was damned inconvenient at times. When she couldn't bear sitting in the dormitory any longer, she went to the cargo bay and saw to the needs of the herd.

That helped, but she wasn't sure she was up to general company just yet. So she started looking for out of the way nooks of the ship.

The Wanderer had two defensive gun turrets, a small computer-controlled one under the cockpit, and a larger one on the top hull that could be operated by a person if needed. That turret was where T5 usually hung out when he had no other tasks to do. Sure enough, the squat astromech was there, plugged into a recharging socket he himself had rigged up.

There was just enough room for her to squeeze into the gunnery chair around the droid.

T5 beeped ominously at her as she did so. A screen nearby lit up, and Kara glanced at it. It seemed to display a proper translation of the droid's beeps. "What are you doing here?" it read.

"I just need a place to be away from people for a bit," she said.

He beeped again, more insistently. "You _are_ people! That doesn't make any sense! This is _my_ place...."

Kara thought about that for a minute. "You're right. I'm sorry, I should have asked before barging in here." She started wriggling out of the chair. "I'll go."

Another beep, this one almost hesitant. "Wait. Why are you hiding in the first place?"

"I, uh... I need to think through something. Something happened with Renn and I'm not sure what it means."

More beeps. "Renn is... complicated." Another beep. "If you want to, you can stay... for a while."

"Thanks, T5. I appreciate it." Kara returned to her perch and watched the stars.

After a time, T5 beeped again. "What happened with Renn?"

"It was.... I dreamed that he and I had sex," she said. Somehow it was easier to say this to the little droid that than anyone else.

He digested that for a long time and finally let out a series of beeps and hoots. "Sex is the dumbest thing organics do. You all really _like_ it, and you all either _do_ it or choose specifically _not_ to. But it still gives you the most hang-ups in your programming. That's just bad design."

She actually laughed. "Yes! Yes, it is."

Beep tweet beep. "But you said you only _dreamed_ you did this. Does it mean you want to?"

"That's what I'm trying to figure out. I'd never really thought about it before."

T5 let out a storm of beeping so insistent it took the computer a moment to translate. "I do not want a horde of smelly, stinky baby organics on this ship. I am not cleaning up after them. If you  have one, then it is your responsibility, not mine. I have enough to do without cleaning up after some helpless organic poop factory."

Kara smiled and patted the droid's dome. "Don't worry, you wouldn't be my first choice as a nanny. B4, maybe, but not you."

Beep. "Oh, well, that's different then."

She laughed. "Besides, it was only a dream, right? It probably doesn't mean anything."

Beep frotz. "Dreaming is the _second_ dumbest thing you organics do...."

Kara stayed up in T5's turret for a few hours more, but eventually, she yawned. "I guess I better head downstairs and go to bed. Thanks for letting me hide here, T5... and for the perspective."

Beep. "You're welcome, Kara. As organics go, you're all right."

She clambered down the ladder and retreated to the room she shared with Liana. It was deep into ship's night by now and the Trianii was already out cold. A ration bar and a drink bulb sat on Kara's bunk, obviously left there as a dinner replacement.

Kara munched it and got ready for bed.

As she pulled the blankets about her bare shoulders, she fervently hoped there wouldn't be any more dreams tonight.

***

The farm was still gone, of course. At least the green had grown over the blackened char. If she squinted, she could still see the outlines of their fields, but the grasses were continuing to blur even those lines. Soon this entire area would be returned to the wild.

Except for the little rise with the view of the southern horizon, and the four gravestones which looked out over the land before them. The wild undergrowth hadn't approached there, and somehow she knew it never would.

Kara knelt at the graves of her parents. Sten Ni Vanden and Mairi Ni Vanden hadn't deserved their end; they were good people. They had taught their daughter well, and raised her to be kind, gentle, and to love the gifts that life brought.

Somehow she knew they were there, two ethereal phantoms standing behind her. She could turn, and they would be there. Her parents. She longed to see them, but sat rooted by fear.

"Don't fear those who have passed." It was a voice she had heard only once before, and then it had been full of grief. She looked up.

Lord Venaar had favored rich brocades and jewel-encrusted robes that spoke of wealth and power. The man whose shade stood before her wore simple homespun, and its calm tan suited him. He was still breathtakingly handsome, but gone was the overwhelming sense of presence, the compelling beauty of Venaar.

Kirennan knelt to her level. "Do not fear those who have passed, cousin. We come not out of grief, but for the sake of love." And with a gentle smile, he faded from view.

Kara turned then, and standing behind her, looking just as they had in her memories, stood her parents.

She couldn't speak, but it was okay. No words were necessary. Her mother came and embraced her, and all was right with the world once more. She felt the love of her mother and father wash over her, carrying away the fear, the burdens she'd borne since that fateful day. She felt her father's rough hand on her shoulder, then stroking her cheek. She felt his pride in the person she'd become. They had seen her grow. Watched as she found a place and friends, which over time had become a second family, a new home... and they approved.

Her tears welled and fell, and her mother's incorporeal fingers brushed them away. Sten smiled and Mairi kissed her forehead. Not all tears were an evil.

At length, the two specters rose, and, with final nods, they faded from view.

Kara felt oddly detached. She knew she should feel sadness, renewed grief, but somehow, she did not. She felt contentment.

"You grow in wisdom, my granddaughter," said a final voice, one Kara had known must come last.

Selene.

"At the behest of your family, I have brought us all to you. The distance between us has grown too great for them to appear to you in any other way.

_Then, I won't see them again,_ Kara thought. _I am alone once more._

"No, they have all passed beyond. But they are waiting for you, across the veil between this world and the next. Until then, they have one last message, one final wish."

Kara nodded. She would do anything for her family, anything.

Selene's spectral form embraced her as once her mother had. "They would bid you to go forth and _live._ Do not dwell in the past, or linger among the terrible memories of what has been. Draw strength from our memories, Kara. For we are always with you."

From far beyond the endless blue of the dream skies, Kara felt the first fingers of dread creep toward her heart. Selene sensed them as well, for she turned away and faced them. "The scars of the past are slow to heal.... I sense through your bond that your friend's soul is still in torment from the Silence, and from your healing of his broken shards."

Renn was suffering. He had endured so much because he had simply stood beside her against the evil that had taken her family... and, on some level, she'd known that her efforts to heal him had left him burned by her light as well. She couldn't help him, not with this. It was beyond her.

"Be at peace, child. The fault lies not with you, but with me. I allowed that festering wound to endure, and the cost was beyond my reckoning. I'd thought it closed, but then it consumed my own son, Jhoral... and then his son... but no more."

Selene stepped back and put a hand over Kara's heart. "I cannot stop events set in motion long ago, but I can heal the damage caused to my family."

Kara felt power flow from the old woman's shade into her, and across the Force bond into Renn. It wasn't the blinding light that had driven away the Silence. This was something infinitely more complex, and far gentler.

"The dark dreams of Derra IV will soon end," Selene said with a small smile. She began to fade from view. "The gateway has been sealed for all time, and while the galaxy is dangerous, there is light and Music enough for all that live."

And she was gone, leaving Kara alone once more.

"Not alone." Selene's voice came on the wind. "You will see me again in this life, Kara. I am always with you...."

Kara awoke in the blackness of the dormitory on the Wanderer. For the barest moment, she felt such loss. But then she heard Liana shift in her bunk across the room. Through their bond, she felt Renn drift once more into peaceful sleep, his nightmare averted, and she knew somehow that Aeron was near him, deep in a meditative trance.

She felt the hum of the engine, heard the slight sounds of the ship about her. She was safe.

Rolling over, she looked at the small jar sitting on the shelf next to her bunk. Small and bright, poking out of the dark soil, was a single flower, newly opened.

She was home, with her family.

***

The rest of the trip was... actually kind of boring.

Renn mostly kept to the cockpit, more out of habit than consciously trying to dodge the others. He was still busy hunting down every scrap of information he could find about Gaman. It wasn't much, so far.

Kara had stopped avoiding him completely, although they hadn't really relaxed around each other, not the way they had the other night when they'd talked for hours. She still blushed when she caught him looking at her, and he still had trouble meeting her eyes. But at least she wasn't fleeing the room immediately when he came in. It was a start.

He hadn't had any more dreams, or nightmares, the rest of the trip. Mostly, he thought, because he worked himself to exhaustion at his computer terminal every night. It was a different kind of numbness, but it was a relief not to have to worry about what else his subconscious was going to pull out and spring on him.

They finally landed at a docking bay in the largest dome on Nar Hekka, an artificial structure built to protect its inhabitants from the inhospitable climate of the planet they'd settled on. Personally, Renn thought it was a pretty stupid idea to live on a world that wanted to kill you, but no one had ever accused certain Hutts of intelligence.

As Kara helped with loading the herd into a lift trailer for transport, Renn greeted the Hutt's representative, and played nice until the man was satisfied. He had very little respect for the Hutts and their self-important lackeys, but a client was a client, even if they weren't directly getting paid.

The plan had been for Naira to take their payment, purchase the parts they needed, and have them delivered on Nar Hekka. She had said everything would be here waiting when they arrived. Renn frowned as he looked around the sparse docking bay.

"So... where are they?" Kara asked.

"The parts were supposed to be here already," he said absently.

"You Falani?" A new voice can from the entrance of the docking bay.

Liana had drawn her blaster automatically, and Aeron and Kara both went for their lightsabers, but Renn held up a hand to stop them.

"Who's asking?"

"I was supposed to deliver some parts." The brown-haired woman who spoke wore simple coveralls with a tool belt. She might have been a dock worker, or maybe a mechanic. She was leading a repulsor pallet with a couple of crates on it. "Got the downpayment, but the final payment never came through."

"What?!" Renn asked.

She shrugged and consulted a datapad. "Says here I can't release the delivery until we get the last six thousand credits."

Renn frowned. Either this was a scam, or a payment error... or Naira had stabbed him in the back, too. That amount wouldn't bankrupt them like the full cost would have, but things would be lean until they could find more work.

Liana's eyes narrowed. "What are our options?" she asked, her words low, between just the four of them.

Renn shook his head. "Either we pay, or we're stuck here," he said. Hesitant, he looked at Aeron and Kara.

"She's being truthful," Aeron said. "But she's nervous."

"Not about us though," Kara said. "It's more like she feels she's taking a risk meeting with us.... Something else has happened."

Renn turned back to the woman, taking a few steps closer. "Do you know what happened with the final payment?" he asked. "It was supposed to be made already, by a woman named Naira out of Nar Shaddaa."

The worker shook her head, then finally said, "I heard there was some kind of accident, but I don't know the details."

Renn's stomach knotted.

Liana's tail whipped back and forth. "Pay her," she said at last, loud enough for the woman to hear the words as well. "But I want you to inspect the parts first, Renn. Confirm that they are what we need, and in good shape. I will not have us stranded here."

The woman nodded her agreement to Liana's request. "That's fine, as long as I get paid eventually." She shrugged.

Renn went to inspect the delivery, opening the crates. He was thorough, despite the fact that all he could think about doing was getting on the Wanderer's comms to find out if Naira was okay. If something happened to her because he'd gotten her involved....

As he worked, he saw Kara hovering nearby out of the corner of his eye. She was looking at him with a concerned expression. Yeah, it wasn't surprising that she could sense his unease. They were like two loose wires sparking off one another. 

Finally, he finished his inspection and stood. "Looks good to me," he said, looking back at Liana. She nodded, and he pulled out his datapad to transfer the credits.

***

Back aboard the Wanderer, with their new parts stowed in the engine room and ready for installation, Renn went to the cockpit first. He could start the repairs later. Right now he needed to know what happened.

He tried messaging Naira as well as reaching her directly over a comlink, but she didn't answer either. He started a search of planetary news and records on Nar Shaddaa, the feeling of dread in the pit of his stomach intensifying.

He found it soon enough. It was being called a tragic and senseless accident. Naira had been struck by a speeder going too fast, and killed instantly. The driver was intoxicated, and had also died at the scene, when his vehicle rammed into the side of a building.

Renn sat back in his chair, staring numbly at the screen.

There was no way this was really an accident.

It was just like what had happened with Daj, all over again.

He'd done it again. He hadn't learned his kriffing lesson after the last time. He'd gotten someone else killed for no good reason. All because he'd asked her for help. 

A very soft, very hesitant step came from behind him. "Renn?"

"What do you want?!" Anger simmered in him. He almost _wanted_ Kara to start a fight with him, so he could lash out at something, anything.

"I-" Kara broke down crying. "I can feel your grief, your anger...." He wasn't even looking at her, so how did he know she'd fallen to her knees, that it was too much for her? How did he know that she'd let him rage at her, let him yell and scream, no matter how much it hurt her, as long as it helped him?

How?

He didn't want to, but he forced himself to turn in his chair to look at her. Kara was crying because of him. Damn it. Something else he'd screwed up.

"Naira's dead," he said. "I-"

His console chimed a new message notification, interrupting whatever he'd been about to say. He turned back and opened the message automatically.

Text only, not signed. It simply read, "Always look both ways...."

There was no question who it was from. Renn slammed his hand into his console, guilt and anger and frustration finally boiling over.

And then Kara's arms were around him, her face buried in his shoulder.

It wasn't a passionate embrace. It wasn't like his dream. It was more like the moment she'd first seen Renn after they'd rescued her from the Sith. When she'd felt at the end of her rope, and they'd offered her a way out.

"She-" Renn let out a trembling breath. The words were difficult to say. "Naira was killed because she was looking into something for me. Because she helped me. Just like Daj."

Kara's embrace never wavered, but he could feel her shudder with tears, even he shuddered with the remnants of anger. Two sides of the same grief.

He closed his eyes. The rage slowly drained out of him. "Hey, I... didn't mean to take it out on you," he said after a long moment. He touched her shoulder lightly, an offering of apology.

"I know," she whispered. "You were shocked, and angry, and hurt." She let go of him and sat in the pilot's chair next to his station, just like she had the other night, when they'd talked for what felt like forever.

"It's no excuse," he said.

Kara reached over and laid a gentle hand on his where it rested on his console. "You weren't blaming me. You were blaming yourself."

"Well, apparently I'm a death sentence for anyone who tries to help me," he said, with a bitter laugh. "You might want to find another ship before I get you killed, too."

As soon as he said the words, he knew they were going to fall flat.

She gave him a level look. "I'm going to assume that was a bad joke, because you're not getting rid of me that easily, spacer boy."

"Yeah, I figured," Renn said. Then he looked down at his hands, at her hand resting on his. "It was Gaman. I've been trying to find him after he stabbed us in the back at Bhardesh. I asked Naira to look into him for me, see if she could find out anything." He nodded toward his display. "He just sent me confirmation that he was behind her death. So that's two I owe him."

"Two _we_ owe him," she said, with such fierce zeal he was very glad she was on his side.

Renn looked over at her, his expression serious. "I'm going to send Naira's family some money, if I can. I did the same for Daj's family, before we left Derra IV again. I owed them that much, after what happened." He hadn't told anyone about that, but suddenly he wanted her to know that he was trying to make things right, as best he could.

Kara slid off the chair onto her knees, and dug into her hip pouch. "When you do, send them one of these." She came up with one of her clear gemstones.

"What? No. Those are from your grandmother. Besides, it's my fault. My responsibility. I got Naira involved."

"To help _us,_ so yes." She took the crystal and set it in his hand, wrapping his fingers around it. She looked up at him, meeting his gaze. "And when you're done, will you send another to Daj's family, please?"

"Are you sure? I mean-"

"Renn, it feels right. As soon as the idea occurred to me, I heard this... swell in the Music. This is the right thing to do."

"I will never understand this stuff, but fine. If that's what you want." He paused, watching her, then he smirked. "Huh, I thought you were still refusing to look me in the eye."

She blushed and started to look away.

"Hey," Renn said, "please don't. This is getting ridiculous, Kara.... Look, we don't have to go into details about what happened. Can we just move past it and go back to being... friends?"

"I- I'd like that," she said. She met his eyes again while she said it. She still blushed, but it was a beginning.

And then, over what he thought of as the bond, Renn felt something oddly specific. Maybe he thought it, or maybe she did, but either way, he felt it plain as day.... _For now._

***

Outside the cockpit, shielding himself for all he was worth, Aeron Rhade allowed himself one inner crow-shout of satisfaction. It was about damn time.


End file.
